look into my eyes.

I can't save you anymore.

It's come to the point of where I can no longer protect you.

It's not out of spite that I can't. It's more of because I just simply can't.

I don't understand why, but that's just how it is.

I remember when I still could... back then.

I lived in a daily inferno, whilst you had complete control over my emotions.

And yet... I was strong. Or I thought I was. I was strong in the respect that I had built up walls around myself in which I  could block out people from hurting me.

And through that lack of vulnerability, I was able to save you as well... if only for a little bit.

But I'm not like that anymore. Who I was is no longer who I am.

And most likely, who I was hates who I am. I could care any less at this very moment in my life.

There are so many things that must be done. That must be addressed.

I just have to keep going. Keep going and ignore all other inhibitions.

It feels as if that's my only path to surviving.

But to survive what? What exactly is it that I have to survive? Does it not mean that I'll be able to live another day?

And yet... how does one "survive life" though... when all we are met with are the loving arms of death in the end.

No one survives life. You can get through life, but... that's about it.

Or so it seems. Survival... seems to be all that I know.

I wonder how it feels to be human... how does it feel to be like the others, without a past like mine.

I do wonder sometimes.

But, whatever.... life is life and I must live as it wills me to. I'm too tired to fight it. I'm too tired to fight everything.

I just want to live out the rest of my life with as little pain as possible.

I'm much too tired to go through all this bullshit and fuckery again.

It's taken a toll on my heart. It's taken a toll on my soul as well as my body.

I just wan to live.

That's all I wish for. That's all I want. That's all I'm working for.

To live. To die. Perchance... to dream.